How's Mommy at Nearly 13 Weeks?

I've been reluctant to come on here and make a post like this mostly because I don't want to appear to be complaining or in any way ungrateful. I am so thankful for this pregnancy and for another chance to be a mother. If that was not perfectly clear from my prior posts, I want that to be clear now.

This pregnancy has been difficult for me. At first I attributed it to the terrible allergy season. I suffered  awfully in April with allergies and at times was basically non-functional. I was afraid to leave the house. I had so much trouble breathing and getting a breath that I felt like I had asthma and my chest was just so tight. I was exhausted all the time, which I thought was a result of me having to work so hard to get a breath. Surely, it was only by God's grace that I survived that trip to Williamsburg alone with four kids. I never remember a level of exhaustion like that with the other pregnancies, not even with the twins. I've had several days of debilitating headaches.

I have been gaining weight rather quickly and my belly has really popped out this go around. My hair is brittle and falling out and so are my nails. I remain exhausted to the point of being nearly  non-functional most days. I had been attributing this to the fact that I am 39 and there must be something to this advanced maternal age thing after all. I also attributed it to the fact that that I now have four very active children and we are always busy, always running, always on the go.

Then I got a call from the endocrine nurse at Hopkins today. My TSH level was elevated. Here's the kicker--my TSH wasn't just elevated a little (the nurse likes to keep her cancer patients' TSH levels at the lowest level possible without being hyperthyroid, so when she said elevated, I was thinking ok, it's still normal), it was 20. In a normal person, a TSH above 5 would be high. In a cancer patient, she likes to keep it around 1. So 20 was really high. I have no idea why or how it got so high. I had it checked a few months ago and it was 1.1. But it goes a long way to explaining not only the very rapid weight gain but also the extreme fatigue and brittle hair and nails and probably the worst constipation I have ever had. I feel better knowing what the cause of these problems is and hope to feel better in a few weeks on a higher dose of medication. I am concerned that this will have already caused problems for our baby. I remember well when I was pregnant with the twins how carefully my thyroid was managed by my high risk obs. They told me untreated hypothyroidism in the mother can lead to lower IQ and developmental delays in the baby, so with each of my pregnancies I was tested once a month and my medication adjusted accordingly. Of course, right now, being on an anti-Google kick, I refuse to look anything up. I mean researching this issue will not change what already may have been done. It's all in God's hands and I am just trusting in Him right now. And I am also very thankful that there is relief in sight.